Chapters in this book

1. Frontmatter i
2. Contents vii
3. Acknowledgments xiii
4. Introduction: “We’ll Take It” 1
5. We Arrive. 8
6. “We’re About Beer” 11
7. The President Buys an Ice Cream 14
8. Too Many Choices 17
9. First Fall 20
10. The Big Coat 23
11. The Lecture Circuit 26
12. Snow Bowl 29
13. Hold the Foam 32
14. Goodbye Newsroom, Hello Classroom 34
15. The Case of the Disappearing Porch Furniture 37
16. Freeze 39
17. Go! Be! Do 41
18. Cooties 43
19. Images from Kosovo 45
20. The Provost Was Not Amused 47
21. Pyropetrics 50
22. Year of the Ant 52
23. Lies My Students Tell 54
24. We Need to Remember 56
25. Old Eyes 58
26. Let There Be Laundry 61
27. Lifeways of the Yard People 64
28. Naked Run 67
29. Toss It 70
30. Mob Scene 73
31. When It Rains, It Floods 75
32. Don’t Expect to Be Bored 77
33. Back to School and Out the Door 79
34. Not Quite Business as Usual 81
35. Nothing But a Pack of Cards 83
36. The Solace of Routines 85
37. Little Idiot Children 87
38. Under a Dark Sky 90
39. Let Us Commence 92
40. No Magic Circles 94
41. Ship of Fuels 96
42. Questioning Authority 98
43. Zen and the Art of Driver Training 100
44. Keeping the Streak Alive 102
45. Movie Dog’s Last Reel 104
46. The Brats in the Frats 106
47. RIP, Bop the Movie Dog 108
48. Welcome to the Diploma Store 110
49. Things Fall Apart 113
50. Liberals on the Loose 115
51. The Invisible Poor 118
52. Meet the Woo People 120
53. Leaf Ballet 122
54. All the Classroom’s a Stage 124
55. The Flower Within the Flower 126
56. In Defense of Those Pesky Gen Eds 128
57. The Pursuit of Liveliness 131
58. Tow Story 134
59. Straight from the Lion’s Mouth 137
60. I’ve Sneezed and I Can’t Get Up 140
61. Stand-Up Guy Seeks Position 143
62. Return of the Woo People 146
63. Must You Go 149
64. Football’s Terrible Beauty 152
65. How to Rein in the Woo People, Part 1 155
66. How to Rein in the Woo People, Part 2 158
67. Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Drunkenness 161
68. Secrets of the Woo People Revealed 164
69. Let the Joyous News Be Spread 167
70. Noise Essential to Woo Life, Researcher Says 170
71. We Are—Going to Be OK 173
72. Seeing Something and Saying Something 176
73. We’ve Got to Get Ourselves Back to the Garden 179
74. So Many Opinions, So Few Facts 182
75. THON (Jekyll) vs. State Patty’s (Hyde) 185
76. The Fumbler and the Furnisher 188
77. Farewell to the Woo People 191
78. Things are Just Peachy Around Here 194
79. As I Was Saying 197
80. Greetings from Zombie Nation 200
81. Welcome to Alt-State College 203
82. Ten Things to Be Thankful For 206
83. Who’s Naked Now 209
84. Apples vs. Icebergs: Who’s Right 212
85. Battle of the Bamboo 215
86. To Weed, or Not to Weed 218
87. In Search of the Cure for the Summertime Blues 221
88. Don’t Be Rattled 224
89. It’s Wonderful to Be Here, It’s Certainly a Thrill 227