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First Girl Sex

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Becoming Who I Am
This chapter is in the book Becoming Who I Am
125First Girl SexIt was expected that I do something. She was kind of like, “We might as well at this point.” I just kind of did that to her and I was like, “I’m done!” (asher, age 13)You might expect this chapter to be brief— gay boys having sex with girls. Nationally, about half of gay youths report at least one sexual experience with a girl, primarily during adolescence. First they’re friends, then they’re dating. Sex might feel obligatory, if not by him then by her because that’s what dating teens are sup-posed to do. He complies, though not always with enthusiastic ini-tiative. He experiments and has fun, or simply considers it about time. Some gay youths fi nd straight sex satisfying both emotion-ally and physically. Others conclude, “I could live without it” or never take the fi rst step.Although they are not currently that into girl sex, one- third of the young men I interviewed had had sex with a girl/ woman, but very few rave reviews followed. Of the two- thirds who had never touched a girl’s vagina, the vast majority had no intent of changing that status. Some expressed disgust with vaginas, and others spec-ulated that it might be in ter est ing to try sometime but had no plans to do so any time soon. Maybe they’d dated girls in high school but just didn’t go further.First I’ll consider the heterosexual virgins. Next, I’ll discuss the youths who have had minor sex with girls or women. The young men with oral or real sex (vaginal intercourse) experience close the chapter.
© 2017 Harvard University Press, Cambridge, MA and London, England

125First Girl SexIt was expected that I do something. She was kind of like, “We might as well at this point.” I just kind of did that to her and I was like, “I’m done!” (asher, age 13)You might expect this chapter to be brief— gay boys having sex with girls. Nationally, about half of gay youths report at least one sexual experience with a girl, primarily during adolescence. First they’re friends, then they’re dating. Sex might feel obligatory, if not by him then by her because that’s what dating teens are sup-posed to do. He complies, though not always with enthusiastic ini-tiative. He experiments and has fun, or simply considers it about time. Some gay youths fi nd straight sex satisfying both emotion-ally and physically. Others conclude, “I could live without it” or never take the fi rst step.Although they are not currently that into girl sex, one- third of the young men I interviewed had had sex with a girl/ woman, but very few rave reviews followed. Of the two- thirds who had never touched a girl’s vagina, the vast majority had no intent of changing that status. Some expressed disgust with vaginas, and others spec-ulated that it might be in ter est ing to try sometime but had no plans to do so any time soon. Maybe they’d dated girls in high school but just didn’t go further.First I’ll consider the heterosexual virgins. Next, I’ll discuss the youths who have had minor sex with girls or women. The young men with oral or real sex (vaginal intercourse) experience close the chapter.
© 2017 Harvard University Press, Cambridge, MA and London, England

Chapters in this book

  1. Frontmatter i
  2. Contents v
  3. Preface vii
  4. Anthony 1
  5. Tell Our Stories 7
  6. Why Am I Gay? 17
  7. First Sexual Memory 31
  8. First Arousal 37
  9. Sex Play 45
  10. First Crush 59
  11. Who’s That Girl? 65
  12. Who’s That Boy? 71
  13. The Joy of Puberty 81
  14. OMG! A Wet Dream 111
  15. Masturbation 115
  16. First Girl Sex 125
  17. First Boy Sex 139
  18. I’m Gay—Prob ably, Certainly 159
  19. Something to Tell You 175
  20. Hey Mom, Dad, Bro, Sis 191
  21. Mostly Gay 215
  22. First Love 225
  23. He’s My Soul Man 251
  24. Being Young and Gay in America 263
  25. Postscript: Anthony’s Return 283
  26. Appendix: Methods 297
  27. Notes 303
  28. Acknowledgments 315
  29. Index 317
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https://doi.org/10.4159/9780674974586-013

Chapters in this book

  1. Frontmatter i
  2. Contents v
  3. Preface vii
  4. Anthony 1
  5. Tell Our Stories 7
  6. Why Am I Gay? 17
  7. First Sexual Memory 31
  8. First Arousal 37
  9. Sex Play 45
  10. First Crush 59
  11. Who’s That Girl? 65
  12. Who’s That Boy? 71
  13. The Joy of Puberty 81
  14. OMG! A Wet Dream 111
  15. Masturbation 115
  16. First Girl Sex 125
  17. First Boy Sex 139
  18. I’m Gay—Prob ably, Certainly 159
  19. Something to Tell You 175
  20. Hey Mom, Dad, Bro, Sis 191
  21. Mostly Gay 215
  22. First Love 225
  23. He’s My Soul Man 251
  24. Being Young and Gay in America 263
  25. Postscript: Anthony’s Return 283
  26. Appendix: Methods 297
  27. Notes 303
  28. Acknowledgments 315
  29. Index 317
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